I wrote this poem because of my mother who has been suffering from cancer since 1999 and although she has fought eleven years, she is a massive influence to me and other people whom she talks to at the hospitals she goes to. Unfortunately, cancer will most likely be in her for the rest of her life. But, life can be sweet and amazing as I’ve been blessed to have the best nineteen years with her and hopefully, many more will come when I turn twenty, twenty-one. However, if she were to die, I’d turn into an empty shell full of ubiquitous tumbleweed just flowing through my vacant personality. Death happens to us all but for all those with cancer, I hope my poem lifts some spirits. <3
BC/AD by Ryan Boothroyd If wasted tears could build a bridge between us to share, Then I’d cry frequently, to have you here, without fear. They say some questions have answers… but none are here. They say some answers don’t answer… but I care. BC = Before Cancer, AD = After Diagnosis, is what you say. Labelling it doesn’t make it better, it grows inside of you. Outside of you. Consumes you. Please, please, sit down, talk, listen and just pray. That’s what they say, to pray and lay and pretend it’s fine. I can’t sit here pretending to be happy, I’m all alone. They say some questions have answers… but none are known. They say some answers don’t answer… but it’s an unclear line. BC = Before Complications, AD = After Death, is what they say. But do they know anything? Their medical speech confuses, Bruises, loses, it’s jargon to me. Please, please, just take these meds to heal, just for today. But one year later, they’re still in you, catching dust. Fascinating how green is comforting; is it? Green is mean. They say some questions have answers… still unseen They say some answers don’t answer… in disgust. BC = Before Coma, AD = After Dream, is what’s said. You’ve left, you never said goodbye, they took you. All of you, no eyes, just the cries. Please, please, just sleep it off, that’s what I read. But the leaflet lied, and you died; with grace. In my dreams, you’ll roam, glow as I watch your face. They said some questions have answers… I’m learning. They said some answers don’t answer… But, I’m yearning. BC = Before Crying, AD = After Your Determination, is spoke in the quiet. Gone is your physicality, what remains is your legacy. All of you in memories, untarnished. Please, please, I’ll think of you soon, but never will my heart cure the riot.
